Tuesday, October 14, 2008

The Amazing Race: "Did you push my sports bra off the ledge?" (Ep 3)

Lots of stuff going on this episode. Let’s get to it.

Before the race even starts for the day, the Divorcees are already bringing out their claws. I’m beginning to understand why they’re divorced… wowzers. One of them apparently thinks that Starr pushed her sports bra off a ledge at the hotel where they were staying the night. OH NOES. SHE DIDN’T. That has such a HUGE effect on the outcome of the race! NO WAY. Like OMG guys, O. M. G. *Passes out from shock.* As my friend so adequately put it, WHY was her underwear out on the ledge for any nudging at all? Keep it on the body or in the closet please ladies. And really—if that’s the criteria for making enemies…I’d have billions. BILLIONS.

Anyways, the teams are off to La Paz, Bolivia! Huzzah for high altitudes with no air! They are forced to stay overnight at the Simon Bolivar statue and wait for a clue that will appear in the newspaper the next morning. The blondes (who are really the comic highlight of the season) aren’t thrilled about the hard ground, but at least they’re “sleeping next to Simon Bo-LEE-VARRRR.” ROFL. They’re so oblivious it’s almost endearing.

At this point, Nick wants to repair this tiff between them and the Divorcees about the bra thing. They’re like “WHATEVER. This is a HUGE deal! Like, I can’t believe that she did that! We hate you, and we don’t forgive you. Because her pushing my bra off the ledge is going to make us lose.” Please. Stop. Talking.

They find the ad in the paper for a hat sale, where they must go and buy a hat to be used later on in the episode. They receive their next clue at that hat shop, and it instructs them to WALK ON FOOT to the Detour. Not all teams read so great… DUN Dun dun… The nerds and Terence/Sarah hop in a taxi and head off. But wait. WAIT! Sarah reads the clue again and is all “WE HAVE TO GO BACK! WE HAVE TO GO BACK!!!” She seriously needs to shut up, I can’t take it. I was so sad she realized it. Unfortunately for the nerds, they noticed much later on in the race.

U-Turn drama at the Detour. Teams can either ride strange wooden bikes down a huge hill or walk through town collecting marching band members along the way. Most teams opt for the biking, which turns out to be sort of bumpy and complicated. On the bikes, the Divorcees are all like “OMG girl, we’ve GOT to U-turn Nick and Starr! They are so not our BFFs. She messed with my bra!” What-flippin’-ever chica. Get over it. Starr and Nick of course pass them going down the hill, which was totally satisfying.

On their way down, they pass team Boresville (aka Aja and Ty), who has the personality of a turtle watching paint dry. There’s like nothing there people. Anyways, Starr is like “please guys, we don’t want to be the mean ones. U-turn the divorcees, please.” And Aja of course says nothing because she’s almost incapable of speech. In one anti-climactic moment, the U-turn went unused.

Down with the marching bands, the frat boys are stressing out because they’re too high-strung about how slow their band is moving. I LOVED it when the blondes passed them and were dancing and waving about, completely clueless to the fact that it was a race, but still moving faster than the frats. Fantastic.

Now comes the hilariously good part. Not only were they dressed up as wrestlers a la Nacho Libre, but they were fighting short little Bolivian women in skirts. This is priceless. Ken and Tina arrive first and finish quickly, and their off to the pitstop. The Nerds and Blondes arrive early, but struggle with the routine. As the other teams begin to arrive, the same scene plays out each time, but it’s just as hilarious with every flip and kick. I’m TOTALLY moving to Bolivia, lol.

While sitting and waiting, Aja discovers her ability to speak and mentions to Divorcee #1 that Starr asked her to U-turn them. Oh Aja, you finally speak, and I now I hate you. LEAVE BRO/SIS ALONE. GOSH.

Of course the Divorcees are last, and they’re super angry with Nick and Starr because of the whole bra and almost-U-turn situation. Seriously girls, I hope you have bigger problems in your lives. “OMG girl, I’m totally going to confront her. If we leave, I’m gunna cuss her out at the finish…blah blah blah.” I cannot stand these women.

But wait. OH NOES. The Nerds have incurred a 30 minute penalty for taking the taxi when they were supposed to walk. Therefore they are eliminated from the race, and the bra-obsessors stick around. Ugh. Had the Nerds finished the Road Block in better time, they would still be in the race without a doubt. It’s really too bad, but that’s what carelessness gets you in the Amazing Race.

I’m still rooting for Nick/Starr and Toni/Dallas. The Blondes have made it into my top three just for entertainment value and comedy. Them as a final three would be great!

What did you think of the whole bra situation? Who are you rooting for? The Amazing Race airs on CBS Sunday nights at 8:00 pm eastern time.

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